(inner) child support
Before I decided to go to college for Business™, I thought about going to art school. My grandfather was a grocer turned stockbroker and my grandmother was an artist and art teacher. I was lucky enough to grow up next door to them and I spent my days after school at their house. From a young age they were both very formative in shaping my view of family and the world. The importance of providing, the importance of self-expression. I chose the traditional and stable path and sought fulfillment and recognition in my field of operations. And while I was successful enough to build a very nice life for my family, art always felt like the road not taken; my “what if…”. I’d daydream and look at the various studios and community colleges and see classes in the middle of the day on a Tuesday and think, “One day…”
And then that day finally came! So when I first quit my job, I immediately filled all my time with the art classes I’d always wanted to take. My new obsession came in the form of learning how to make jewelry, specifically silversmithing. I never wore much jewelry before, but there’s something different about being able to wear a piece of art you made. I feel so much gratitude every time I practice making jewelry. Gratitude to myself and husband and for making the stable choices and working hard to afford this break. Gratitude to myself for recognizing my needs, and having the courage to take the leap.
I also feel so much joy. I think because I know how it felt for so long to not be doing the things I loved and how the last time I felt as free was when I was a child doing art in my grandmother’s studio next door.
My kids were fascinated watching me shift from working at a screen all day to making shiny pretty things in my office (which was never really just an office, but half art studio). They’d ask me what my teachers’ names were (shout out to Jen at KP Studio!), what I learned in class that day, and specifically what I made for them. That is part of the joy I feel too, knowing that I am doing it for them and setting the example that there is more to life than work. But I am also doing it for my own inner child.
However, coupled with that joy, I also feel an immense heaviness with the state of the world and my country. There are so many children just like mine, people just like me, who have never and may never experience the same freedom or joy of standing in their own humanity and creativity because of where they were born, what they look like, or the pressures of capitalism to always be “productive.” And because of that I know that I am also extremely privileged to take this time for myself.
So I'm hoping to do something useful with my new skills; to pay it forward. And I'd like my art to be out in the world. And with that, I'd like to announce that jooklab is officially open for business!
You’ll now find a “Buy Stuff” page on this website where I’ll list all the fun things I’m making for purchase. Right now it’s just jewelry, but who knows what other obsessions I’ll develop. You can also request a custom commissioned piece! And if you want to help me pay it forward, there’s a special “Slant’d Ring.” With every purchase of a Slant’d Ring, I’ll donate 50% of the proceeds to Slant’d (the non profit that saved my sanity) to help uplift other AAPI creatives.
And when you wear your piece of handmade jooklab jewelry, I hope you’ll remember that we are all creative and full of potential, especially your own inner child.
Love,
em
